Before I get to the photos of where we went on Saturday, can I just confess something to you?
Just between us, okay? You can't look at me sideways at church, email or call me and ask me if I'm okay, or really think less of me in general, okay? Deal?
Sometimes, I don't really like my two year olds.
Don't get me wrong, I LOVE them every day. It's just that somedays I don't like them. And I don't think it's specific to the two year olds that I currently call mine. I remember when another dynamic duo was two and, somedays, I didn't like those two year olds either. Love them so much my heart might explode? Yes. Like them? Notsomuch.
Why are we Moms afraid to admit that there are just some ages that we are not so good at dealing with? I mean, I can handle a crying infant. I can handle it for long periods of time with little-to-no end in sight. I can rock and swing and walk and snuggle an upset baby for the majority of most days. I can handle the sleepless nights and the constant feedings.
But give me a defiant, overly dramatic, completely irrational two year old, who can't adequately articulate what he/she wants to say and then flies into a furry of pissed-offness because I can't understand his/her words...well, it's more than I can handle when it consumes my life every other 5 minutes.
I look at my sweet little Ella and wonder how many more months I have of her awesomeness until that day hits and the two year oldness begins. I'm praying for her to go straight from 16 months to 3 years. I'm doubting that's a providential prayer.
Yesterday was a rough day with my two little two year olds. I love them more than I could ever put into words but yesterday, I didn't like them very much. The irrationalness of throwing a fit because I won't allow a 2nd cup of juice and flinging a body on the floor because I won't allow coloring on the cabinets crawls all over me. As a coping mechanism I ignore irrational behavior and casually step over whomever is writhing on the floor in complete agony because I'm a mean Mom who refuses to allow you to play with the electrical socket.
And while I'm busy dealing with constant meltdowns, I'm wondering how Christlike I am to these irrational, overly dramatic tiny people on a daily basis. I mean, I try so, so, so hard to put myself in their size 5 shoes. I try to think about how hard it must be for them to try to tell me something that they want or need and yet I just can't understand. I try to understand that, often, they have to wait a few minutes and waiting isn't easy for a person with no concept of time or the needs of others. But my frustration level with them is easily increased, much to my ill attempts at keeping my heart and head in check. I've prayed prayers of patience, asking God to fill in the gaps of my humanness and supersede my shortcomings when I feel that tightening in my core because I just can't deal with another meltdown right now.
But most days, I don't really rely on Him to provide me with grace. Most days I just allow the anger and frustration to wash over me and I fly into a sea of redundancy allowing wave after wave after wave of meltdowns to overtake me. And then I lose it.
See? If any of you thought that I had it all together you can now rest assured that I am not at all together. In fact, if together was ever a word you used to describe me then you can purposefully never combine that word with your thoughts of me.
It's just that these two little folks who are obviously going through a phase and thistooshallpass seem to intentionally do the exact things they know they will get a consequence for.
And it drives me bananas.
I'm not suppose to slam the door and you tell me that every.single.day? Oh good.
SLAM THE DOOR! SLAM THE DOOR! SLAM THE DOOOOOR!!!
I'm not suppose to open and shut, open and shut, open and shut the kitchen cabinets? Oh good.
OPEN AND SHUT OPEN AND SHUT OPEN AND SHUT OPEN AND SHUT!
It's not okay for me to play with 3 specific toys that are set aside and out of reach and only for the older kids? Oh look!
I CAN SCALE THE BOOKSHELF AND JUST TOUCH SAID TOY WITH MY ITTY BITTY FINGER UNTIL IT FALLS AND THEN I HIDE AND PLAY WITH IT.
I mean, seriously?! There aren't many things that they are restricted from. I learned that lesson quickly with our first set of two year olds. I choose my battles and make very few things off limits in our home. Toys and play are free and easily managed by these little toddling persons. I mean, afterall, it's their house too and they shouldn't be scolded every 5 seconds just for living. But there are boundaries and there are a small number of toys that they are not allowed to play with. But it seems that is exactly what they want to do.
You know, exactly what they aren't allowed to.
Oh how it drives me crazy. And every time a child of ours comes into this age I forget that two year olds are like this and it blows my mind all over again.
So do me a favor, will you? When Ella hits about 17 months old, will you remind me that her twoness is just around the corner? Hopefully it won't take me by surprise like it has 5 other times. Hopefully.
And if you are a superstar at parenting a two year old, I could use a tip or prayer ortwo three.
Just between us, okay? You can't look at me sideways at church, email or call me and ask me if I'm okay, or really think less of me in general, okay? Deal?
Sometimes, I don't really like my two year olds.
Don't get me wrong, I LOVE them every day. It's just that somedays I don't like them. And I don't think it's specific to the two year olds that I currently call mine. I remember when another dynamic duo was two and, somedays, I didn't like those two year olds either. Love them so much my heart might explode? Yes. Like them? Notsomuch.
Why are we Moms afraid to admit that there are just some ages that we are not so good at dealing with? I mean, I can handle a crying infant. I can handle it for long periods of time with little-to-no end in sight. I can rock and swing and walk and snuggle an upset baby for the majority of most days. I can handle the sleepless nights and the constant feedings.
But give me a defiant, overly dramatic, completely irrational two year old, who can't adequately articulate what he/she wants to say and then flies into a furry of pissed-offness because I can't understand his/her words...well, it's more than I can handle when it consumes my life every other 5 minutes.
I look at my sweet little Ella and wonder how many more months I have of her awesomeness until that day hits and the two year oldness begins. I'm praying for her to go straight from 16 months to 3 years. I'm doubting that's a providential prayer.
Yesterday was a rough day with my two little two year olds. I love them more than I could ever put into words but yesterday, I didn't like them very much. The irrationalness of throwing a fit because I won't allow a 2nd cup of juice and flinging a body on the floor because I won't allow coloring on the cabinets crawls all over me. As a coping mechanism I ignore irrational behavior and casually step over whomever is writhing on the floor in complete agony because I'm a mean Mom who refuses to allow you to play with the electrical socket.
And while I'm busy dealing with constant meltdowns, I'm wondering how Christlike I am to these irrational, overly dramatic tiny people on a daily basis. I mean, I try so, so, so hard to put myself in their size 5 shoes. I try to think about how hard it must be for them to try to tell me something that they want or need and yet I just can't understand. I try to understand that, often, they have to wait a few minutes and waiting isn't easy for a person with no concept of time or the needs of others. But my frustration level with them is easily increased, much to my ill attempts at keeping my heart and head in check. I've prayed prayers of patience, asking God to fill in the gaps of my humanness and supersede my shortcomings when I feel that tightening in my core because I just can't deal with another meltdown right now.
But most days, I don't really rely on Him to provide me with grace. Most days I just allow the anger and frustration to wash over me and I fly into a sea of redundancy allowing wave after wave after wave of meltdowns to overtake me. And then I lose it.
See? If any of you thought that I had it all together you can now rest assured that I am not at all together. In fact, if together was ever a word you used to describe me then you can purposefully never combine that word with your thoughts of me.
It's just that these two little folks who are obviously going through a phase and thistooshallpass seem to intentionally do the exact things they know they will get a consequence for.
And it drives me bananas.
I'm not suppose to slam the door and you tell me that every.single.day? Oh good.
SLAM THE DOOR! SLAM THE DOOR! SLAM THE DOOOOOR!!!
I'm not suppose to open and shut, open and shut, open and shut the kitchen cabinets? Oh good.
OPEN AND SHUT OPEN AND SHUT OPEN AND SHUT OPEN AND SHUT!
It's not okay for me to play with 3 specific toys that are set aside and out of reach and only for the older kids? Oh look!
I CAN SCALE THE BOOKSHELF AND JUST TOUCH SAID TOY WITH MY ITTY BITTY FINGER UNTIL IT FALLS AND THEN I HIDE AND PLAY WITH IT.
I mean, seriously?! There aren't many things that they are restricted from. I learned that lesson quickly with our first set of two year olds. I choose my battles and make very few things off limits in our home. Toys and play are free and easily managed by these little toddling persons. I mean, afterall, it's their house too and they shouldn't be scolded every 5 seconds just for living. But there are boundaries and there are a small number of toys that they are not allowed to play with. But it seems that is exactly what they want to do.
You know, exactly what they aren't allowed to.
Oh how it drives me crazy. And every time a child of ours comes into this age I forget that two year olds are like this and it blows my mind all over again.
So do me a favor, will you? When Ella hits about 17 months old, will you remind me that her twoness is just around the corner? Hopefully it won't take me by surprise like it has 5 other times. Hopefully.
And if you are a superstar at parenting a two year old, I could use a tip or prayer or