Friday is here once more. This week our house was full of interesting conversations. I use the term "interesting" very loosely here people. Verrrry loosely. Nonetheless, I hope y'all enjoy this week's edition of Das Not Funny! Friday.
It's bedtime and once again our bedroom door creeps open after all our precious ones should be tucked away for the night.
"Mom?" Ashlee says softly.
"Yes?" I reply.
"Um. Wizabets went poop in our bafroom and she needs you to come wipe her."
"Ashlee, please tell Elizabeth that she is big enough to wipe herself and to wipe and go to bed."
"Okay," Ashlee replies.
Less than a minute later....
"Momma?" Ashlee says again quietly.
"Yes Ashlee."
"Wizabets says she needs you to come do one scoop on her butt then she will do da west."
"Ashlee, repeat after me, okay?" I say, "Elizabeth..."
"Wizabets..."
"Mommy said to wipe your bottom..."
"Mommy said to wipe you buttum..."
"and get in the bed right now."
"and get in da bed wite now."
"Thanks Ash. Now go tell Elizabeth," I direct.
"Okay."
The door shuts.
The door opens.
"Mom?"
"Yes Ashlee?"
"I wuv you."
"I love you too."
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Driving home after dark one night (which doesn't say much because it gets dark here at, like, 5:45pm) Luke and I spot an opossum running from the road.
"What was that?" I ask my brave, fearless husband.
"I think it was a opossum," brave, fearless husband replied.
"What's a p0sst-um?" Ashlee asks.
"It kind of looks like a really, big rat," I say.
"And it's the size of a raccoon," brave, fearless husband adds.
"O0000," says Ashlee. "I don't wike wats."
"Good choice Ash," I say.
"Kank you!" exclaims non-rat loving Ashlee proudly.
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"Okay Buddy, let's get your undies and pants on so we can go," I say to Lucas.
"Put your foot in...." I begin.
"No Mom! Wait! Turn my undies awound. I wanna see da Batmans!"
"You know that is the back of your underwear, right?" I ask.
"Yep. I wike dem dat way," he says, matter-of-factly.
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"Mom and Dad?"
"Yes Elizabeth?" Luke responds.
"Why do policemens have such big jobs and such little cars?"
Luke, looking confused and glancing in my direction..."Um. So that when they need to drive fast their car won't tip over."
"Oh. Because if they drove a big van like ours then they would get in a bad wreck?" she asks.
"That's right baby. That's why Daddy doesn't drive fast in our big van," Luke continues.
"Yeah, and then our big van would get all scratched up and I would be sad," Elizabeth noted.
"Yeah! And den it would catch on fire and we could wide it and it would be SO! MUCH! FUN!" Ashlee added.
Glad she lives in the land of excitement and joy, even when it pertains to perceived disaster.
Don't you want to join me this week for Das Not Funny! Friday? It's simple, really. All you have to do is write your own Das Not Funny! Friday post. Then, link it right back here. Finally, enter your info into MckLinky so that my blog will link back to yours and we can all enjoy your funnies.
Y'all have a conversationally awesome weekend. Happy Friday!
